Fun Friday

Another in what I am hoping to start making a regular feature here. Fun Friday.

Over the years I have amassed a HUGE amount of jokes, funnies and anecdotes. To all those who have sent these to me THANKS...

Below is a list of various things broadcasters have said... bringing into crystal clarity the TRUE meaning of the phrase "Think before you talk":

• Michael Buerk watching Phillipa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1’s UK eclipse coverage remarked: "They seem cold out there, they’re rubbing each other and he’s only come in his shorts."
• Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining up shots at the Scottish Open: "Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself."
• Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports: "Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis’s misses every chance he gets."
• Jack Burnicle was talking about Colin Edwards’s tyre choice on World Superbike racing: "Colin had a hard on in practice earlier, and I bet he wished he had a hard on now."
• During the 1989 Masters golf tournament, commentator Richie Benaud observed: "Notices are appearing at courses telling golfers not to lick their balls on the green."
• Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said: "There’s nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this."
• James Allen interviewing Ralf Schumacher at a Formula One Grand Prix, asked: "What does it feel like being rammed up the backside by Rubens Barichello?"
• Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: "Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69."
  The new stand at Doncaster race course took Brough Scott’s breath away … "My word," he said, "look at that magnificent erection."
• Willie Carson was telling Claire Balding how jockeys prepare for a big race when he said: "They usually have four or five dreams a night about coming from different positions."
• A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn’t, turned to the weatherman and asked, "So Bob, where’s that eight inches you promised me last night?" Not only did the weatherman have to leave the set, but so did half the crew, they were laughing so hard.
• US PGA commentator: "One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them. Oh dear lord!! What have I just said??"
• Metro Radio: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It’s like they’ve got eleven dicks on the field."
• Harry Carpenter at the Oxford / Cambridge boat race in 1977: "Ah, isn’t that nice? The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew."
• Ted Walsh (horse racing commentator): "This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother."

Having read these again I can only but imagine the search hits that I may be getting now.

Have a great weekend all.

Photoblog

During some free time today (which is a very rare event) I was browsing through some of my photo's that I actually have in digital format on my laptop... mostly pic's from a business trip to Copenhagen last year, and decided the following:
1. I want to start putting them on my blog for others to enjoy aswell
2. I need to invest in a scanner to get some of my better prints digitised
3. I must get back to some of my hobbies

So, here is pic no. 1. - Boats in Nyhavn, Copenhagen

and no. 2. - out to dinner with some colleagues

USELESS organs – a question of faith?

After having suffered my 5th bout of tonsillitis in the last 6 years I decided to do a little research into this little organ that most people live the majority of their lives without.

As it turns out, I DID have mine removed when I was about 5 years old, but it seems they liked me soooo much and where living such happy lives that they decided to grow back… the little bastards. Apparently this is not uncommon and happens in an estimated 1% of people who have had theirs removed. It occurs when a small piece of the ‘organ’ is left behind and it then regenerates (much like broken/cut skin regenerates to heal).

BUT what does it do? And why do I need it?

On my merry search I discovered that this very question is in fact being used as a point of contention in the whole argument of evolution vs. creationism. Evolutionists say that the fact that we have organs that are of little or no use any more is proof that we do in fact evolve. However the Creationists say that these are NOT useless and, no matter how trivial, these organs do serve very important purposes.

Nowadays doctors are much more reluctant to remove these organs, unless something life threatening has occurred (i.e. burst appendix). If you really want to know more a very simple Google search (“vestigial organs”) will give you more than enough to numb anyone’s brains into a temporary comatose state.

This however got me thinking about my beliefs, and the question “Where do we come from?” and no… 42 did not work for me here.

I found that, as strong as my faith is, I also have a very analytical/scientific mind. I have to know why or how things work… faith only takes it so far. I do believe that we have evolved and that the bible is not meant to be taken literally but is rather a guide in our lives. However, science only goes so far. At some point we have to stop and say… okay but where did that come from… where did those first atoms that collided together originate? I am also very uncomfortable with the idea that all we are is a random meeting of molecules. A scientific eventuality of the right conditions to produce life. That implies that there is no meaning, no purpose, no goal, pure luck. And then, what is the point. That is FAR TOO DEPRESSING.

However, on the converse of this argument, I also don’t believe that every single step we take in our lives is pre-ordained or planned. I believe that we have been put here with a very definite purpose in life and the journey is to discover that purpose. In the end WE are in control of our own decisions and lives. How we choose to live it, and the rules that we chose to govern it, is our own decision to make.

May whichever God you pray to be with you on your search for purpose. And for those who choose no God… may you find all your answers too.

New MUST READ

When browsing through my site meter, and in particular that page that tells me where the referals are coming from (or at least what the last page was that someone was on before they came to mine) I stumbled apon a GEM of a blog. ANTARCTICA!!!

It details the lives of a group of scientists in ANTARCTICA... and NO it is not nearly as dreary as it sounds. If it is the only new site you visit you have to check it out... if only for the "Men of the South Pole Calendar". You'll thank me later.

Among the other "referals" are the people we all know and love... Katt, Chitty, KN, Michelle and company. However some of the more bizaar one's include links from google/yahoo searches such as

• "single mom blogspot"
• "describe a single mom personality"
• "good idea to date a single mom"

... and my 2 all time favourites...

• "Reasons to Date a Rugby Player" and
• "will young's mom" (I don't want to know ?????)

And as for the geographic make up of my 'visitors'... well the graph tells it all... GO SOUTH AFRICA GO....

'A' is for Apple

Thanks to Chitty for tagging me with the letter 'A' and giving me the kick up the backside to 'put pen to paper' as it were. If you are wanting background as to what the hell this is all about read here...

My list of 'A' words:

Let's start at the very beginning, a very good place to start
Alpha:
More than just being the first letter of the Greek alphabet, it is the universally accepted term to indicate 'the beginning'. Whenever I hear the world I am reminded of the biblical quote " I am the alpha and the omega, the beginning and the end". Somehow that has always been an encouraging thought and fills me with a little hope. There is something greater out there and our existence here on earth is not merely a random chance meeting of compatible molecules.

Aequeosalinocalcalinoceraceoaluminosocupreovitriolic:
Yes, believe it or not this is an actual word. With fifty-two letters, this is a claimant to the title of the longest word in the English language. The word is attributed to Dr. Edward Strother (1675–1737), who devised it to describe the spa waters at Bristol/Bath, England.
OKAY then...

Africa(aka HOME):
Described in Wiktionary as follows "The continent that is south of Europe, east of the Atlantic Ocean, west of the Indian Ocean and north of Antarctica." Yes, but is is soooo much more than that. Africa is home... the motherland to all human beings (depending on which 'scientific' fad we are going through at the time).

Aquarius:
The Zodiac sign for the water carrier, covering January 20 through February 18. My Sign. I also found in my reading that the opposite to Aquarius is Leo… my ex's sign, which might explain a lot. I really must find out more about this and put it to good use when next I meet the supposed Mr. Right.

Attraction:
The Moon is held in its orbit by the attraction of the Earth's gravity
The new mall should be a major attraction
I felt a strange attraction towards the place

AIDS:
I cannot say that this is one of my favourite 'A' words, but it is definitely the one that has the most impact. An epidemic that we in sub-Saharan Africa (as we are now classified) know all tooooo well. In South Africa more than 5,500,000 people are living with aids. There are many studies and reports on this issue... here is but one "Worldwide HIV & AIDS Epidemic Statistics"

Unfortunately this is where the stamina ran out. Chitty, forgive me... I only made 6 out of 10 :)

T.G.I.F.

Now that my PMS induced slump of this week is over I am gearing up for a FAB weekend. To all those who read my blogs this week and started thinking about life a LITTLE TOO MUCH... my appologies.

What is in store for me this weekend... well the kids are heading off to dad again today which means that I have about 48 hours of peace and quiet. Which will be starting off with a trip to the movies to see X3. I have put this off for a week so that I could see it with one of my BESTEST friends who arrived back in Cape Town from Jordan on Monday. On that note... from BLOGTHINGS

You Are Storm

Exotic and powerful, Storm descended from a line of African priestesses. Emotions can effect your powers, but you are generally serene. Powers: controlling weather, creating winds that lift you into flight, generating lightning

Which of the X-Men Are You?

Other that that I will be spending the weekend pampering myself. Now that my bank balance is looking a little healthier again after payday, it is time for some "me-time". I think a facial and massage are definitely in order.

Hope you all have a terrific weekend.

What is happening?

These are some of the news articles over the last few weeks…

Matie's suicide devastates family
Hanged girl found under tree
Man hangs his three children
Teenage girl films her suicide
Mom, sons found hanged
Boy hangs himself in toilet
Man hangs kids, himself
Dad throws kids off bridge

Raped child fighting for her life
Man held for raping six-year-olds
4 arrested for gang-rape of girl, 11
Shocking SA child death stats
More than 25% of Cape schools 'at high risk'
Belgian student tells of gang-rape ordeal

And there there is the whole baby Jordan murder

WHAT IS GOING ON IN OUR SOCIETY? And these are only the ones that made it into the news. I could only find ONE article reporting on someone actually asking questions of the government (DA slams govt over child abuse crisis)

Why is no one making more noise about this?
Why does everyone just get on with their lives as if this doesn’t affect them?

The news will run special report's on the f#@$ing ZUMA trial and BIRD FLU but are completely missing the plot when it comes to issues that REALLY MATTER in our society. Instead of arguing and second-guessing each other over who is going to succeed President Mbeki why not focus on the real future of the country. It doesn’t make a bloody difference who is in charge of the country if there is no one left in it.